Happy New Year/ Round up of 2012

Happy New Year everyone! I know I haven’t written a blog in ages, but I have GCSE exams coming up and I have to revise a lot as I’m not what you’d call ‘academically gifted’. Anyway, please forgive me.

I thought I’d write a little blog rounding up some bits and bobs that have happened to me in 2012, it’s not that exciting and I can’t remember a lot of the things that happened to me. This year, I’m going to write down all the interesting things that happen so hopefully next year I’ll have lots of thing to talk about. Anyway…

 January

I think it was January when it snowed. Snow, where I live, doesn’t come in vast amounts and the snow that we do get turns to ice very quickly. You find yourself sliding to school, as appose to the traditional method of walking. It’s always me that’s the first, and only, person to fall over. It just all happens so fast, one minute you’re chit chatting to your friend about Eastenders and the next minute, whoooosh, you’re on the floor. Of course, there’s always a gang on giggling year 7’s behind you that make a great point of stepping over you while your just sitting helplessly on the floor. This my friends, is why I’m all in favour of school’s shutting at the first sign of snow.

 February

In February I was revising for the exams that take place in March. They weren’t ‘proper’ exams, just mocks put on by the school to ‘test our progress’. The thing is, we’d already had exams in September, and I don’t know about you, but I do not make any notable progress in 6 months. In fact, I don’t make any notable progress ever really. So yes, I spent February revising which was, as I remember, just wonderful.

 March

March was a very good month for me as it was when I did my first ever work experience. I went to a local lifestyle magazine and I had a wonderful time. I learnt lots about working at a magazine; the writing, the photography, the editorial and even the advertising. The people were really nice too and were always on hand to answer questions. I also had a view articles I wrote published, which was lovely and very unexpected.

 April

Chocolate was a major factor in the month of April as it was, of course, Easter. I love Easter because you can just eat lots of chocolate and not feel guilty. I don’t understand why people would want actual presents at Easter instead of chocolate eggs. During the Easter holidays me and my family went to stay in a cottage in Wales for a week, don’t worry, it had WIFI! I thought it was going to be a dull let’s-go-for-another-walk week but I actually had a really good time. We did do a lot of walking but the scenery was stunning. I will stop there as I am aware I’m starting to sound rather middle aged.

 May

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME! In May it was my birthday and I had a jolly time. I had my first pair of Converse from my mum and dad and have quickly become my favourite shoes. They are just so comfortable and they go with everything. Literally, I know longer have to worry about finding shoes that match my outfit, it’s great if you’re into minimal effort dressing like me. I even wear mine with dresses- SHOOT ME. My birthday party involved a trip to Pizza Hut with my friends and then party games out my house, it was great but the cleaning up after wasn’t (I will no longer ask my friends to play games that involve cutting up chocolate with a knife and fork).

 June (You’re halfway there, please keep reading…)

June is an awful month because it feels like it should be the summer holidays but it’s not and that’s sad. I honestly can’t remember what happened in June apart from that my school was really warm and we still had to keep our sweatshirts on.

 July

Finally, finally it was the summer holidays. Don’t you just love the last day of term, when everyone’s running around and swearing at the teacher because they can’t do anything about it? If you go to a bit of a ‘rough around the edges’ school like mine, you may have experienced the tradition of drinking (alcohol) in school on the last day of term. Personally, I don’t observe this practice but several of my friends came in with their vodka-orange juice concoctions and were sat casually drinking them in maths. Let’s just say they were all very… happy… by the time the bell went.

 August

August was the month of the family holiday. The less said about that the better. I’m joking, it wasn’t that bad. But by the end of 2 weeks sharing a room with your little brother and watching your dad attempt to dive into the swimming pool, you’re ready to go home.

 September

‘Back to School’ also known as ‘Kill Me Now’. It’s just the worst thing ever trudging up the school drive after a wonderful 6 weeks off. It’s usually ok because we don’t have to be in until 11am but this year I had to be in, bright and early at 9am to show the delightful new year 7’s around. My tour of the school went something like this:

"This is the library, there is books here.

This is the canteen, there is food here.

This is the tennis courts, you play here (except don’t play because that’s not cool, just stand around in groups trying to look older than you are).

This is the hall, stuff happens here.

This is a maths classroom, I have no idea what goes on here."

 October

October…well it happened I suppose. I was in a show at school called Spooktacular, needless to say it was a Halloween themed performance. A group of year 7’s ‘sung’ Angels by Robbie Williams and I myself was in the school orchestra- we played the theme from Edward Scissorhands. Well, I call it an orchestra, there is only ten of us and it’s all out of proportion. There’s 3 saxophones, 4 clarinets, a flute and 2 violins. I won’t lie to you, we’re pretty awful.

 November

I had my final maths exam in November which was good and bad. Bad obviously because it was maths and that’s not really one of my strong areas. Can someone please explain to me what a Cosine is exactly? But it’s good because now I never have to do a maths lesson again! (yes, that sentence deserved an exclamation mark) I still have a lesson that’s supposed to be maths but I just sit and spin around on my swivel chair because everyone else is doing a ‘bridge to A level’ course that I am refusing to partake in.

 December

FEED THE WORLD etc etc. I love that song, it's my favourite Christmas song, although my mother says if I had released it no one would have donated any money. Charming. Anyway, I love Christmas so much, the food and the music and the presents and the atmosphere. I just love it. Christmas dinner is my favourite meal of the whole year and I start looking forward to it in June. This year was no disappointment, with the usual display of pigs in blankets, turkey and roast potatoes being consumed. Another event that happened in December was that my poor little dog chewed through the Christmas lights and had 240 volts across his tongue. He’s fine now though, he just had a bit of a shock, and a burned mouth.

So that is a round up of my year. I congratulate you if you read it all the way to the end and I congratulate you even more if you aren’t now crying with boredom. So yes, happy new year again and I hope you have a wonderful 2013.

It's that time again!

It's that wonderful time of year when the whole of the UKs teenagers go into a state of depression. Yes, that's right, it's exam time. Well, it will be in a couple of weeks but at the moment it's still revise-loads-even-though-we-don't-care-if-we-pass-or-not time. I hate revising because, for me at least, it's not revising at all, its learning. I have no recollection of learning anything at school that's in my science revision guide so I am having to teach  myself and then revise it the next day. I have a vague memory of doing the things in my RE 'guide to sucesses' in class but to be honest all we do in RE is watch videos and argue.

This whole learning scenario has got me thinking, why do I bother going to school? I clearly don't learn anything that's in the exams so why don't I just stay at home and teach myself? Think about it, we're at school from 9am-3pm with 1hr 20 mins for break and lunch. If I worked while I ate my lunch and didn't have a break I could finish at 1:55! (If my maths serves me correctly). Also, the amount of time teachers spend doing the registers, checking our uniform and checking that we have all our equipment must come to at least half an hour and I wouldn't have to do any of that if I was at home. The majority of the school day is just time being wasted.

Anyway, I must dash I've got chemistry to learn/revise. Do you know anything about the 'Finacial benefits of the Harbour Process'? No, me neither.

My interview

Today I had an interview at school. It wasn't really for anything it was just so we could 'get a feel for what an interview is like'. I know, the excuses our school makes are just ridiculous, we know what an interview is like now could you please give us an education rather than a 'fun interactive day'. Anyway, as I had no choice in the matter at 12:20 today I was sat in the library ready for my 'interview'.We had to dress in smart clothes which for the majority of my school means a new tracksuit that's not got a beer stain on it. I however, decided to be a bit more classy and wear a knee length skirt and a blazer. I'm not going to lie, I resembled a nun.

My interview didn't get off to a good start. I stood by the desk looking over at my interviewer. He was quite broad and I about 50 ish. Also, I don't think he was married because his suit was a bit crushed. As I stood there he was doing some paper work and failed to see me. So I coughed... tapped my foot and edged forward a bit, but there was still no response, to be honest I think he was a bit hard of hearing.

Once he a finally acknowledged my existence he shook my hand and invited me to sit down, about time too. He then proceeded to ask me what GCSE's I was taking. I now realise that saying "GCSE German" was a big mistake. He started to talk to me.. In German. Of course, my mind went completely blank and I couldn't even remember what 'Hello my name is Sarah' was. Actually, I was at a slight disadvantage because my interviewer was from Liverpool so he was speaking German in a scouse accent, it was quite something. I couldn't really make out what he was saying so I just smiled and hoped it wasn't a question.

The interview continued quite smoothly for a while, I had to list my 'personal qualities' and say what I did in my spare time, it wasn't a stereotypical interview at all. Then he asked me what I would bring to his company, so I answered. Then he asked me again "So, what will you bring to my company?" so I answered with what I had said before, re-phrased and gave  him a slightly confused look. Then, to my horror, he asked me again "What will you bring to my company?". I just sat and stared at him, what a strange man. He then said to me "Sarah, this is why you must not let all your information go on the first question, you have nothing else to tell me".  Now, correct me if I'm wrong but the standard procedure is to ask someone a question, listen to their answer and then move on, not to then repeat the question. Why would I need to hold any information back?

After this confusing ordeal he asked me if I had any questions for him. I had several but I didn't dare ask them, he was bigger than me. I really wanted to ask him "Do you often pretend you have a memory problem and speak in Scouse- German in order to confuse candidates at interviews or am I a one off?". Of course I just said "No" and stood up to shake his hand.

I hope my next interview has a little more English and the interviewer does not seem like he should not be in a mental hospital.

I'm back!

Hello again everyone! What a strange sensatiation this is- me blogging!

I'm really sorry I have been away for years but I have been super duper busy with exams and stuff. (stuff meaning all of life's other challenges).

My exams went rather well, I got an A* in German (yarrr) and an A* in R:E (Amen). I got a C in maths which is quite bad but I have decided C stands for 'Couldn't care less anyway' so it's all fine. I didn't do that well in English really, I got an A but that's only because I did well on the creative writing bit, on the other questions I did quite badly. One of the questions was 'How does the title link to the text?',now, am I missing something here or is that really obvious? The title tells you what the text is about. Anyway, I put that and I only got a couple of marks.

Enough about me, how are you? Oh yes, you can't reply to me, oh well, more about me then...

Next weekend I go to PGL (but my mum and dad are still at home so please don't burgle my house) which is an adventure holiday thingy. I'm not telling you which one I'm going to so you can't come and abduct me. I will probably blog about it when I get back but I'm not promising anything because most things I say I will blog about never get blogged.

My mother has bought a slow cooker. Oh dear. She talks about it so much I think she's going to divorce my dad and marry it. Seriously, all I have heard for the past week is "Slow cooker" this and "Slow cooker" that. I'm secretly hoping the novelty will wear off soon.

My dad is 51 next week and I have written him a poem to celebrate. I will post it on here after he has read it because I don't want the Internet seeing it before he does. He is also having an mp3 player and some socks. He is having an mp3 player because he doesn't get on with Itunes. You see, he had my old purple Ipod (he's not fussy about colour) but every time he plugs it into the computer he just swears and pulls it out again- very strange. I do agree with him though, Itunes is a bit of a pain in the neck, even the easiest of things are so hard to do.

Right, I better go now and run my mother a bath (child labour) byyyyyyyyye!

I AM ALIVE

Hello everyone, long time no speak! Just a quick update to say that

A) I am not dead
B) I am still 'blogging'
C) I am not blogging at the moment because...

Stupid exams. I have an exam in every subject within the next month but they aren't even propper exams, they aren't even mock exams, they are exams for the sake of it. Either that or they are so the teachers can say "oh look they have improved since September, we taught them something! How exiting!". Anyway, it is really tempting to not revise for these exams purely to not give my teachers the satisfaction because, let's face it, you only get good marks if you learn it yourself. Unfortunately, my mother has other ideas so for the next week and a bit I will be missing in action, sorry.

I can tell you that when I am back into the swing of blogging I have a review, a barn dancing blog and a snow blog, so... Erm... You can look forward to those... If you want to... If you even care.

This is a very boring blog

**If you read my last blog I thought you might like to know my book is no more. I started to write it on a draft email because I don't have Microsoft Word on my laptop, my email then decided that it was going to create an 'unknown error' and it won't let me view the message. Technology has failed me again.**

I don't really know what this blog is about so I'm just going to ramble until I have filled enough space for this to be a decent length, I apologise if it is extremely boring. Today my English classroom got new chairs and tables. This may seem like an everyday occurrence until I tell you that the chairs are MULTI-COLOURED! They are the coolest thing ever, I sat on a green one, it was great. Although they might be the best thing my school has ever spent money on, the aren't very academic are they? They're not really going to get us better grades at GCSE and they aren't really helping our 'life skills' but hey, they are MULTI-COLOURED CHAIRS!

Today I had P:E and we had to do circuit training. This does mean however,  I actually did any circuit training. Don't get me wrong, i did try to do all the activities but after about 20 seconds I just gave up, too much pain, not enough gain. I attempted to do press-ups, I will never attempt to do them again. Why were these dreadful things invented? I thought everyone would be as bad as me but no, they weren't. After I had finished my set someone a lot fitter than me had a go. It really did put me to shame- she just kept going! No sign of tiring just an even rhythm; one, two, three four, five..... Mine however was more like; one, have a break, two, contemplate the existence of life, three, oh dear the whistles gone.

By the way, I have a German exam coming up (not that you care) so please expect a rant about that, possibly within the hour as I am about to start revising now- I need a good head start. This time we have to write an essay, learn it, then speak it to our teachers in a 'controlled environment'. What a load of rubbish. Yes, by the end I will be able to tell you all about what I did last weekend in German but is that really going to help me in life? Wouldn't it be better to make us learn more useful things like how to say "I need an ambulance" or "My house is on fire" or "Please officer it wasn't me".

I think they should put me in charge of all exams- and on that scary mental image, goodbye!

Please don't kill me

I am writing a book, don't shoot me. I have always said that I couldn't write a book because I would get half way through then get board and stop. I did once write the first bit of a book but my computer crashed and I lost it, that's why I hate technology. Anyway, I am writing a book despite the fact I will probably get board and a piece technology of I need to write it on will die I am going to do it- so there. I have written the first paragraph of the first chapter (I know, I  work at speed) and I might put it on here once I have edited it and got a piece of technology to check the spelling (the version of Microsoft Word I have on my laptop wont check spelling- bizarre).

On a side note, I am ill.

On another side note, I had to do a form assembly today on Martin Luther King; great man, awful assembly. I had to read a paragraph about The Civil Rights Movement, my form teacher had written it terribly so I wrote it again myslef- can't get the staff these days.

Wild at Heart

I love Wild at Heart. Please don't stop reading this blog and send me 3000 hate messages, I don't think it's a good program at all, it's not well made, it's unrealistic and the acting isn't that brilliant either. The thing is, I think it's really entertaining to watch, the bad camera angles make it funny, the script is so far fetched it's funny and the actings so bad it's almost good (if you see what I mean?). It's like the program is making fun of itself and that's what makes it perfect Sunday night television. You have to watch the 'oh so seriouse' Dancing On Ice but then sandwiched in the middle is the light hearted happy go lucky Wild at Heart. I think that's what is missing from todays television a bit of fun, they take everything so seriously, we need more programs like Wild at Heart; being chased by real life Elephants, having a leapord living in the house, a family that's almost too perfect and of course, a happy ending. 

Ice Skating, or lack of.

Yesterday I went ice skating. As soon as I told my mum I was going I could see the look of panic/horror spread across her face. As she and some of my more 'regualar readers' know I don't really give off an 'ice skater' vibe. It wasn't the first time I went ice skating, maybe the third or forth but from anyone observing me they would have thought I had never seen a sheet of ice in my life...
As me and my friends were walking up to the ice rink a thought occurred to me, how do you actually ice skate? It's not programed into our natural DNA and there is only so much Dancing On Ice can teach you. I put this question across to the group and my friend Meg replied with "You just kind of slide, it's like rollerskating". At this point I must add that last time I went rollerskating I nearly skidded into a main road and got hit by a van, luckily my friend caught me. "But I can't rollerskate" I replied the only phrase that Meg could think of that suited the moment was "oh dear" and she was right.

My first challenge was to put on my boots. This is a Blog in itself but I will try and condense it. Basically, after I had collected my boots of a tattooed and pierced 'youth' I found myself a place on the wooden benches and set about putting them on. First of all I had to get my head around how they actually went onto your foot. After secretly observing other people but theirs on I thought I had the knack of it. I didn't. It took me ten minutes of shouting, cursing, stamping, pulling and pushing to get my feet into the boots, they were a bit too big but I couldn't face putting another pair on so I hobbled off to find everyone else. I say hobbled because it is very difficult to walk on normal flooring with blades attached to your feet, why don't you just put the blades on before you step onto the ice? I think I'm the only sensible person on this planet.

At last it was time to get on the ice. Nervously I placed my right foot onto the rink, since when was ice so slippery? Then, I grabbed onto the bar for dear life and hauled my left foot up. For a few seconds I was paralysed, what could I do? I couldn't move, I couldn't go back and I defiantly couldn't 'just go' as the man behind me suggested. After spending a few minutes contemplating the value of life I started to slide myself forward. I slid my hand a few cementers along the bar then dragged my feet along to meet them. I did this for a whole lap- it took me at least 15 minutes.

My friend saw me struggling so she glided, yes glided, over to help me. She grabbed my arm, pulled me off the bar and dragged me round the ice. I have never been so scared in all my life. I was clutching onto her the whole time and screaming "We're going to die, stop, we're going to die!". In case you were wondering, we didn't die.

After 5 laps I was feeling a fraction more confident and started to shift my feet a little bit for myself rather than being pulled forward. Suddenly disaster struck, the two people in fornt of us slipped over and landed on the floor- how inconsiderate. This left us in an awkward situation because obviously it would be rude to skate over them but we didn't have enough time to stop. Then, without even asking my permission my friend let go off my arm and skated around them, this left me hurtling out of control around the other side of them, I was waving my arms around everywhere, desperately trying to stay upright. THUD! I hit the side bar. I had a massive stomach ache but I didn't care, I was still upright and I hadn't broken anything.

I decided it was selfish for my friend to be skating around with me for the whole time when she could clearly be jumping around at 100mph so I let her go. I wasn't on my own though another friend took me into her care, we skated around for a few laps but I think she then decided her limbs were more important than helping me to skate so she went off, I think I was becoming a liability.

Finally the man in charge shouted for everyone to get off the ice, well since I was around the other side of the rink it was another 10 minutes before I got off but still it was over. I was very pleased and as I hobbled back to the bench to remove my very fetching boots I realised, I didn't fall over! I may have caused several accidents but still, the First Aid man only had to come to one of them and I do rather think the lady was making too much fuss, it's only ice!

So, after recent events I can safely say that I will be crossing 'Proffesional Ice Skater' off my career list.

School worries me

Yesterday I was given my 'interim report' from school. This is basically a letter that says all your levels, if you are on target or not and if you are putting enough effort in. Basically, it's so school can tell OFSTED they have given us reports without actually writing reports.

Anyway, my interim was bad. They said I was on a B in English and in Maths- this is a lie. I have never in my life got a B in either subject, just A's and A*'s. I think it's so when I get an A again in year 11 they can say "Look! She made progress, we have taught her something, aren't we clever". They also said I was off target in ICT, I got a merit. Personally, I would be very happy with a merit in ICT as I have no plans to work in computers and the only website I ever use is Google.

The funny thing is these reports are so contradictory. Firstly, all the subjects I was apparently 'off target' for I had the highest effort grades in. Also, and here's the really worrying thing, after being told I was off target in ICT guess what came in the post this morning? I postcard saying how well I was doing in ICT. School worries me.

Have you ever read a blog?

This is a rant, if you don't like rants don't read this, go and read a blog about flower arranging or something.

It really annoys me how people who have never read a blog think they know everything there is to know about blogging and think they have the right to judge it. They say things like 'why would you have a blog?' well, it's better than sitting at home all the time watching 'Big Brother' and eating chips isn't it? The thing that gets me is 99% of those people have never read a blog. That's like saying a song is rubbish without even listening to it. To be honest it's just plain ignorance.

If you have read a blog and you still don't like them, fair enough, everyone is entitled to their own opinion but please try and be a bit respectful about how you put it across. Would you like it if I spoke about 'I'm a celebrity' the way you speak about blogging? No? Then sit down and shut up.

Before you give me the old 'Who reads blogs anyway?' Hundreds, no thousands of people read blogs everyday so please check your facts before you say anything.

If you have made it this far into my rant you are a very brave person, I salute you. Happy blogging.

** I am not trying to offend anyone who watches the television programs mentioned above or any activities mentioned. **

How to pass a German exam

Today was my German exam, the one I blogged about the other day. Surprisingly, it went rather well, I had a couple a blank moments but overall I was happy. I did find it easier they gave us dictionaries, don't get me wrong, I completely disagree with the fact they give us dictionaries in language exams but it did make it so much easier. For example, like us German's have different words for different tenses e.g eat and ate. Unfortunately, in the exam I couldn't remember the German words then I realised my dictionary listed them all! Perfect. All I had to do was work out what tenses were what then I was away, oh the joys of having a big dictionary.

I did use it for spellings too obviously...

Also, I finished half an hour early so I amused myself my watching everyone trying to remember their essays, if you ever have a spare 5 minutes an exam this is such an entertaining experience. Well, it was until a teacher realised what I was doing so then I decided to look up random words in my dictionary. Did you know 'bloggen' in German means 'to blog'- you learn something knew everyday.

Here is one I wrote earlier

I wrote this poem on a bus, at 4am, in about 5 minutes so please don't expect anything brilliant

Being on a bus

Buses are wonderful
Yes, they really are
I think their a lot better
Than traveling in a car

You have the wonderful conditions
All cramped and tight
It's even better when
Your journey is at night

The air conditioning is lovely
So quite and calm
And you can never find anything
Especially sweets or lib balm

The aisle is very spacious
Down it a marathon you could run
And the entertainment is brilliant
Busses are such fun

The tacky tinsel on the window
Adds to the glamourous effect
Bottles are constantly been thrown at you
That you have to be quick to deflect

The seats are just brilliant
Top quality stuff
And you clothes stay in perfect condition
No creases from collar to cuff

Personal space is overrated
Sitting next to strangers is great
Hey, if they offer you a sweet
You've found yourself a new best mate

So that's why I love busses
And the wonders that they are
But next time I think
I'd rather take the car... train, plane or any other form of transport

All I want for christmas is food....

Merry December everyone! It's not quite Christmas yet, people really do need to calm down with the Christmas decorations, but we're getting pretty close. I absolutely love Christmas, it's my favourite time of the year and as you only get about 80 you may as well make the most of every one.

The reason I love Christmas so much is not because of the presents or the cards, it's the atmosphere. It's the time of year that everybody is happy and gets into the spirit of things. For example, I am the worst singer in the world, even my mum says singing is not one of my 'greater talents' but I just can't help myself belting out a couple of Christmas songs through-out December. Also, I am dead set against anything tacky but come Christmas I am all for singing Santa's and dancing snowmen, after all Christmas is Christmas. Even my mum who comes from the rather posh end of York loves a good light up snow globe at Christmas.

I think people of my age tend to forget what Christmas is really about. They forget about being happy and being with their family, all they care about is what presents they get. Don't get me wrong I love Christmas presents but without them I am sure Christmas would still be my favourite time of year where as most teenagers 'wouldn't see the point', which is really sad. Also, they take advantage of Christmas. All year they walk around school saying "Oh yeah, Gods fake init" but as soon as it turns December they are perfectly happy to celebrate the birth of Gods son aren't they? I have nothing against atheists, but if your going to be one, stick to it.

Now, I have missed one vital element of Christmas out of my blog, THE FOOD. I love Christmas food, I love Christmas eve roast ham, I love cheese and crackers at Christmas day tea time, I love boxing day cold turkey but most of all I love Christmas dinner. I look forward to it all year, the turkey, the roast, the stuffing, pigs in blankets, carrots, Yorkshire puddings, cranberry sauce, everything really. I also love Christmas pudding and Christmas cake, they are proper food in my opinion.

So that was some of my thoughts on Christmas, merry Christmas to all and to all a good night- if you don't know where that line is from you haven't had a proper childhood, sorry.

*If you have read this blog and your not christian I hope you have a lovely winter, I hope it snows!*

Language GCSE's

This week I have to memorise a German passage for my exam next week. Whilst I was attempting to understand and memorise this very complicated language a thought came to me; It's not really a German exam is it? It's a memory test. We have to write the passage beforehand then our teacher is aloud to mark it so it's perfect German, then we have to memorise it. In the exam they even give you a dictionary! What is the point? If it was a real German test you would have to write the passage in the exam without a dictionary.

Obviously, I am not complaining, the easier the test is the better, I just think that the exam boards should stop and think what they are actually gaining from this part of the exam. Soon enough the colleges and sixth forms will catch on and a GCSE in German will be thought of as a GCSE in memorising.

While we are on the subject of GCSE's I think it's really wrong how my school (and most schools) force us to do a GCSE in a language. Don't get me wrong, I can see the benefits; it makes you a more rounded person, you have more career options and you will be able to travel more. Maybe I would have taken one out of choice. However, I think forcing you to do one isn't right, if I don't want a GCSE in German then why should I spend hours studying for one? I am never going to go to Germany, I have no wish to work in Germany, and I don't want to be a German teacher.

I'm defiantly not against Germany though, it's a very nice county with some lovely and talented people in, it's just not somewhere I want to be.

So in the space of two minutes we have gone from a GCSE in memorising to how talented the German people are. Welcome to my life.

**Note the same applies to GCSE's in French, Spanish and every other language. I'm not against the county, just the exam. **

Look down your noes at someone else.

Today I will be ranting about people who think they are better than you at something when they are not. For example, people who have just started playing an instrument who think they already semi professional at it and think they have the right to tell you what to do. It's SO annoying, I literally want to turn around and slap them. Obviously I don't because I would probably get kicked out of school and that does not look good on job applications.

The thing that irritates me the most is the fact that they look down at you and smirk when you get something wrong. I just really want to say "Oh! Go and look down your big noes at someone else". But I don't because, believe it or not, I'm actually nice to people's faces. I think they just need to look at themselves because half the time they aren't doing it right themselves.

While we're on the subject of people looking down on you, I also dislike people who talk down to you for no good reason. OK, I might not be the best at maths but I'm not that stupid, honest. Someone actually once said to me "Don't worry, you won't understand this".The cheek of it! It doesn't do your self esteem any good plus it's very disrespectful.

To be honest, it all comes down to people thinking that they have the right to say what they want to you because they have a little idea in their heads that they are better than you. Newsflash! Your not.

**On editing this Blog I realised that I jump from subject to subject a bit, sorry, this is what I'm like in real life**

Blogs, or lack of.

Recently I have not been doing any blogs. There are several reasons why...

Firstly, I had my maths GCSE last week and up until then I was revising and this week I have been getting over the shock that it wasn't actually that hard (if I was superstitious now I would say 'touch wood' but I'm not). Secondly, for the last few days I have had loads of ridiculous  homework, mainly Geography. I hate Geography. All we seem to learn about is rocks and long shore drift, I know there is a lot more to Geography which is why my lessons are so frustrating. Then when he gives us homework it pushes me over the edge, if I have to see another 'rocks and their uses' worksheet again I might do something drastic.

Anyway, where was I? Oh yes, why I haven't been blogging lately. Thirdly, my mother has got this  idea in her head that I have to do more 'work around the house'. It's really fustrating because whenever I'm in the middle of doing something, e.g blogging, she shouts up the stairs "Saraaaaaaah, could you just do me these dishes please?" Or "Saraaaaaah have you got a minute?". Parents eh? Who'd have them?

Fourthly, I have been Christmas shopping. I know it's only November but that is very nearly December and I'm not taking any chances. I do not want to be the friend that gives everyone a half price box of chocolates because they left it too late and all the shops had sold out of everything good. So this year I'm planning ahead and I have got the vast majority of my Christmas presents bought already, and a birthday present. Yes, one of my friends had the clever idea of being born at the end of November so I always end up buying her Christmas present and birthday present at the same time. It's such a pain.

Fithly, I.... Oh dear. My mum has just summoned me, I better go or I won't get fed later.

Until next time, over and out.

Oh look there's a flying pig! Where?

People are taking everything in this word too seriously. I know my blogs can come across as somewhat offensive but I am never deliberately trying to offend anybody. My mother (who most of my blogs are about) has learned to see the funny side and now she actually gives me ideas about how I can poke fun at her. I apologise sincerely if I have offended anybody throughout any of my blogs, they are not meant literally, they are a teenagers view of life.

Please grow a sense of humor.

Oh the Joys of slimming clubs

When you enter into a slimming club it’s hard to know where to look first. Do you feast your eyes upon the ‘wonderful’ healthy food they have for sale? At, may I say, extortionate prices. Do you look at the people within this fine establishment? Such as the row of ‘ladies of a certain age’ gossiping about the dashing bloke from coronation street. Or, do you look at the ‘group leaders’? These people tend have a fixed fake smile on their face and get a little too enthusiastic about low fat yogurt. Finally, if you really wanted to, you could look at the rows of empty seats, put out in case people who actually have a social life decide to swing by, this I must add, is highly unlikely.
Once the meeting is underway things don’t improve much. A round of applause is given to Doris who has lost a stone, and now has the pleasure of choosing a sticker to attach to her tight fitted top (‘Ladies of a certain age’ really shouldn’t wear lycra’) And a standing ovation is given to dridre, who has reached her target weight (all I can say is, I wonder what she was like before?!). This ‘sharing of achievements’ session carries on quite smoothly from then on, there was a bit of an awkward silence when Peggy couldn’t pull her ‘I lost weight’ hoddie past her neck, put I have to say, she persevered and (eventually) got it on.

Next up is the ‘activity session’ this week they are ‘exploring ways to stay healthy at BBQs’ (they must really be scraping the bottom of the barrel for ideas now). Dridre starts off the discussion by saying she is going to compromise and only have seven sausages next time she has a bbq, this statement is followed by a gasp and a round of applause. Dorris then pipes up that she will "eat what she wants and burn her calorie counter on the bbq if she has to" Dorris is removed from the meeting. The group leader suggests that ‘We all try and balance out our meet with vegetables’ "RABBIT FOOD" shouts Dorris from outside the door, this is followed by another awkward silence. Peggy breaks the silence by suggesting that they all try and have a healthy drink such as water with their bbq, so as to balance out the calories. Her round of applause is interrupted by Dorris, who is now standing on the roof of her car, drinking a can of stella and singing ‘We will rock you’ when she sees everyone is watching her she makes a rather rude gesture, and then continues to break dance to the chorus. An uncomfortable rumble travels around the room and the discussion is abandoned.

The last part of the meeting is slightly predictable. The Group Leaders try and sell everyone ‘slimming club must haves’, these include special scales and a magazine about ‘making the right choices’ the older ladies lap up the products eagerly, I don’t think they understand the word ‘commission’. The group then disperses in an array of fiats and people carries. As for Dorris, she has been caution by the police, and as she puts it, is ‘to cool for slimming school’.

Lets Zumba our way out of this one...

*I must apologise for the lack of apostrophe in the title, for some reason blogger won't let me have one*

Zumba- A dance/fitness program inspired by Latin dance. Spanish slang for "to move fast and have fun

I hate Zumba, with a passion. It's basically a glorified fitness class where 'women of a certain age' go to 'keep fit'. My mother has started Zumba and she showed me some last night, it really is awful "Step, clap, step, shimmy" she chanted as she marched up and down the kitchen with no particular rhythm at all. Watching my 40+ year old mother trying to shimmy has scared me for life. She looked like a plonker, to put it mildly.

Now, I must say, I don't have a problem with people going to Zumba (unless they have teenage children who they could embarrass) , it's not up to me how people waste their time, but, I do disagree with how they sell it;
'Zumba is a great way to loose weight fast' - Erm, no it isn't, nobody I know has ever lost any weight.
'Feel the benefits straight away'- no, unless you count aching arms as a benefit.
'Qualifed instructor'- Excuse me, but what qualifications do you need to be a Zumba instructor?

Do you see what I mean? It is being sold as a new fitness craze when in fact it's nothing more than a social event. Plus, the women who go take cakes to eat afterwards. So, in effect they are 'burning calories' only to put them back on again... Surely I am not the only one who can see this?! Not that you burn any calories 'Zumbering' anyway, all you do is walk around a bit, clap your hands and touch your toes.

I was just thinking, it must be a strange sight watching people enter a Zumba class. I bet you can see middle aged women 'limbering up' which involves stretching their arms a couple of times then sitting down again because they "musn't over do it". And you can see an array of Zumba outfits ranging from tracksuit bottoms and hoodies to full on belly dancing outfits. Women over 50 shouldn't be aloud out of the house wearing that kind of thing. And then, once everyone is suitably dressed and 'limbered up' they all enter into the Zumba class, armed with their Good House Keeping magaizines and Inhalers.

Zumba- I know, it looks thrilling.